Thursday, September 20, 2007


WELL DUH! No shit Sherlock! Note what they put side effects are for castration. Um Dumb ass....of course there will be a decline in sexual interest!!!! Dur Mr or Ms journalist at the AP. Did you forget that that would be the "OBVIOUS"? They also continue to say that there would be erection problems. DOUBLE DUH!!!! Isn't that the idea. So that there won't be any erections?! This article below was in the news last week and since I'm going out of town for a few days and have nothing else to talk about, I decided to blog about the dumb ass who wrote this. But did they really think that we wouldn't figure that out for ourselves and that's why he got the operation. TRIPLE DUH AP!!!! That's generally what castration means. Any 11 year old will know that when you chop off someone's balls, you're not going to get an erection, have any interest in sex, OR be able to procreate for that matter. Gor blimey, that is one idiot journalist.

PANAMA CITY, Fla. — A confessed rapist was sentenced Thursday to 25 years in prison, days after he voluntarily underwent castration as part of a plea deal to avoid a life sentence.
Circuit Judge Michael Overstreet sentenced Bobby James Allen to 25 years in prison followed by 10 years' probation. Allen pleaded guilty this month to three counts of armed sexual battery and other charges involving attacks in 1998 and 1999. Allen requested castration in exchange for a reduced sentence.
The surgical procedure cost about $2,000, and the court system paid for it, public defender Doug White told The News Herald of
Panama City. A message left with White after business hours by The Associated Press was not immediately returned.
Overstreet warned Allen to expect hormonal changes that could lead to the breast development, osteoporosis and hot flashes. Castration results in sterility, a decline in sexual interest and erection problems.

Ha ha. He's gonna get man breasts and need a manssiere. Hur hur. I bet he'll find himself a mighty fine husband in da big house.

Sunday, September 16, 2007


What's up with the 411 operators lately? The last dozen or so calls I've made to 411 were all persons (both male and female) who were undoubtedly Filipino. I know that accent anywhere. I spent 6 weeks there. There's no mistake on my part that when you and I are dialing 411 it's being routed to the Philippines. They have no idea how to find what you're looking for. When you just hang up and dial again, you get yet another clueless about "your town" Filipino person on the other end, who just doesn't understand you when you say simple things like "Cheesecake Factory". I had to spell out cheese because she wasn't understanding my thick Chicago accent. Jesus. I was like, "C as in Charlie. H as in hotel, E like echo, E like echo, S like sierra CAKE!" Then a dude didn't understand me asking for a certain spa and again I had to spell it out. "S like sierra".................. It's been frustrating, trying to get a number and fly out the door. The calls are too time consuming. You best look up a number yourself on Google. You can get it on your mobile phone now. If you can't figure out how to do this, just ask a 6th grader. There's only 2 people in my whole circle of friends who have figured out how to use Google on their phones. You don't pay extra for this in most cases. You don't have to have a pda for this feature either. I say boycott 411. I don't have anything against Filipinos. But they have been making a poor excuse as a 411 operator. I think it's best to talk to a Filipino from the Philippines face to face. It's much easier to communicate when they can see your lips and hear you in person. Otherwise this over the phone crap is shite. Especially when the call takes several minutes, and you just want to run out the door to get somewhere. On another note. If the tables were reversed, I'd be the bomb operator in the Philippines. I've never not understood a Filipino with a thick accent. I've always understood them perfectly.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007


It seems that there has been a sudden surge in Hare Krishna's of late. For the last 2 months I've been seeing bands of them frolicking about town. They are trying to recruit flaky people who feel the need to join some sort of an exotic club free. (And probably to piss off their folks.) I thought I had been transported to the 1979 movie "Hair" and that Treat Williams was going to come and stick his tongue down my throat. (I wish) I felt like smoking a blunt, lighting a few sticks of some sandalwood incense and sing along and dance with them with flowers in my hair. Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare- Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare.
I remembered the words. I had the soundtrack.
I suddenly turned into old lady mode and made eye contact with other people standing by, doing the one eyebrow up, smirk look, one makes when weirdo's are nearby. The leader was histrionically Jesus like, holding his hand out like the way you saw Jesus in all the movies of the present and past. It was like watching actors rehearse. Then they'd stop and give some rhapsodic spiel to the curious youth who had yet to see the likes of these colorful highfalutin, hippy, wannabe street preachers.
Yup, tambourines, dhoti's, sari's, love beads and all. They were actively trying to get some new members. Their brochures had some place of worship embossed on it which I couldn't make out at the distance I kept. So I later Googled for the location and found out it's walking distance from my house. OY VEY!!! So I can look forward to a new kind of skin head prancing around my hood come spring. Great.
Something about street preachers that puts me off. I know that it's ones duty to spread the word of their religion. But I'd rather not be approached, harangued or haggled (for donations) by anyone. I'll give to my own causes on my own terms thank you very much. I'd rather "seek" out on my own. If I have questions about some religious order, I'll do the research on my own at the library or Internet. I'll go to a church or temple with my own questions in hand, to seek whatever answers I may have on my own terms as well. I'm sure that 90 percent of these kids who join up now will be married with kids in normal jobs 12 years from now. As with anything, all fads come and go. Like the British punk look. It comes it goes. The mod look. It comes it goes. Bell bottoms they come they go. I just see this as another one.

Saturday, September 08, 2007


What ever happened to Jameson Parker and Dirk Benedict?
I bumped into an old co-worker of mine and she asked me if I was married. Ha! I told her, "no". "What about you?", I asked. She said, "yes". After the usual back and forth she says, "I thought you'd be married by now with a brat. You always were dating nice guys who looked like Jameson Parker or Dirk Benedict. You know real vanilla wafers." What ever the hell that meant. No one ever described guys I dated as the Jameson Parker or Dirk Benedict type before, but I have to admit, I did date at least two guys that look like Dirk in my life. I do admit I have a penchant for real white boys. No fault of my own. I grew up in a German neighborhood. These were the first boys I knew in life. Nice, good boys. I don't date only German boys though. Next in line usually were Scots, Scots Irish or Irish. Whatever. I didn't go out of my way to choose these guys. It was just happen chance. My mom was funny, if I met someone, she'd ask me which celebrity did he look like. Because I dated guys who looked like Matthew McConaughey, Rutger Hauer and a Ewan McGregor prior to her passing.
After the Starbucks lunch (pumpkin loaf & an iced venti soy latte), I came home and wondered what happened to Jameson Parker and Dirk Benedict. So I looked up Dirk on the Internet Movie Data Base AKA
B" movies and also acted in Germany.
On his web site he's written books and done plays. O.K. he's fine. Normal stuff. Then I looked up Jameson of Simon and Simon fame, and he did movies, t.v. shows and also wrote books but there was a little ditty that freaked me out on there. Says he was shot twice by a neighbor by a neighbor on October 1, 1992 near his condominium in Studio City in a dispute over dog waste. He was released from the hospital a day later. The man who shot him was charged with attempted murder and sentenced to 9 years in state prison. What a freak. 9 years in prison only. Just because he didn't cripple or kill him. Don't get me started. I swear this seems to be a trend. No one ever gets any quality time anymore. That's why there's so much violence out there. They give people short sentences and no follow up anger management required. I know this for a fact that it does not occur in Chicago. Once you're out that's it. You're an angry person forced to eek out a living without any anger management requirements or career opportunity. They also make it impossible to commit a family member who needs to be put away. Then when that person snaps and kills another, the other person's family wants to sue the psychotic or schizo's family for not taking charge of their relative. Nice going America. For all the brains and wealth we are known for we suck at MUCHO. Protecting civil rights has gotten out of hand already. There's too much protection IMO. Let's protect all the losers, illegals, psychopaths, sociopaths, celebrities, and killers because we don't want them and their families to miss out on the next election.

Monday, September 03, 2007



I'm not lobbying to ban colloquialisms and slang words. I'm not jumping on the same kind of bandwaggon as the French by banning all words English. It's just that our country will have some version of apartheid. We will be separated even more so than now because of language. Just like in places in China or India where there are scores of different dialects and no one understands the other. Each little village with their own language. Is that what Americans want? That's not good if it is. It's bad that our senior citizens aren't understanding the boy behind the counter at the Mickey Dee's. I heard a senior struggling with his version of English a couple years ago. Our senior citizens don't understand what's going on on a MTV special or Pimp my ride . All my friend's mother kept saying was....I don't get it. What's he saying? while watching t.v. with her daughter. (The lady wasn't hard of hearing either) Slang is replacing English as we knew it. More and more I'm hearing people talk lazily as well, and it's being accepted.

I'm gonna go get my hair did.

I took my baby his bath.

Why you not be listening?

How come you always gotta be so late?

Wow, you be styling wit them threads?

And I'm gonna pimp my ride.
My peers don't even get that one.
But like I said before, the slang terms aren't what bothers me. It's the use of double negatives and improper English. Not the slang. I guess I got use to it. I just feel sorry for the old senior citizens who don't have a clue. There are people over 40 who don't have a clue as to what twenty somethings are saying. It's gotten ridiculous. Furthermore, when I'm 68, I will want to understand the nurse who is giving me instructions for pre or post surgery. Or my pharmacist on how to use my medication.
Just watch the movie Burning Down the House with Steve Martin and Queen Latifa for a prime example of what I'm saying.

Sunday, September 02, 2007


Today I'm being peevish because I seem to hearing the extinction of the English language. Just like Darwin's theory, it seems to have evolved to a bastardized version of English. It's a cross between Spanglish (or Llanito as they call it in Gibraltar) and Ebonics. People actually born in the United States have accents that are not indigenous to the city or state they're born in. Don't know how it happened. I'm not a scholar. I just know what I hear. I'm just saying that if you're third or fourth generation United States citizen, you should not call an ambulance an AM BALANCE. And please ASK me a question don't AXE me. It'll be a bloody mess. Chocolate does not have three syllables. Neither does the word English.
It's Chok'lit and Ing'lish! Jesus. How did this happen? I'm not asking Americans to speak in the queen's English. Just a little bit better English. If you're an American and are bothering to speak it, do it well and do it right or don't do it at all.

Then there's my all time favorite. The word is supposedly not supposably.

Suddenly new accounts of how something happened go like this in conversation, "It was fire and smoke everywhere. I couldn't see anything". Years ago it would have been, "There was so much smoke and fire everywhere that I couldn't see anything". Or, "It was lots of loud music coming out of their house. Only 20 years ago it would have been said like this, "There was really loud music blaring out of their house." And, "It was mistakes made" instead of, "There were mistakes made". What happened to the world there??? Did it fall out of the dictionary? Was there a grand theft? Someone let me know what happened to it.

I also hate double negatives too. It's trash to my ears when I hear it. Aint never and didn't never. Don't say, "I don't want nothing", or "He don't like that" I'm the first one to say, "SUP" in an email or text, but to say it out loud would pain my ears.

There are a million and one slang words and words said differently in the south or east coast. "I aint bovvered". It's not a complaint. It's when one is trying to sound intelligent and improper English comes out, well it definitely makes or breaks a person. Better English will get you a better pay check for sure.

Here's a list of my all time favourites:
Teef = Teeth
Toof = Tooth
Meer'ah or Meer = Mirror (pronounced) Meer'rohr
Jag you are = Jaguar (pronounced) Jag'wahr
May naize = Mayonaise (pronounced) May'o'naize
Flutist is pronounced Floo'tist. Not like flauta with beef or chicken!
Yah'ma'kuh is actually Yar'mul'ke with an R and an L
Do not say REE-luh-tur it's REE-ul-tur
And Nuclear (nuk lee ER) not Nook you lir (G.W.!)
These are words that can be properly pronounced even if you have an accent. My friends haven accents and pronounce these words all right. So don't be sending me hate mail for being prejudice. Don't put words in my mouth that I'm not saying. There are so many dumb asses out there who do critique me for griping about stuff like this, like I'm their enemy. Like I have no right to make a comment about a person NOT PRESENT who mispronounced something wrong.
There should be no excuse for mispronunciation. I know people who dropped out of high school after sophomore year who speak proper English. So I'm not bashing foreigners or high school drop outs. You should speak proper English if you only graduated from 8th grade. I spoke proper English by the time I was in 7th grade and I went to public schools.

I'm also not criticising the different dialects and regional accents. I come from the deez and doze capital. This is not about "to'may'toe - to'mah'toe either.

Some of you will "get it" and some of you wont get what this is about. I shall not expound much further.

I think one partial reason for mispronunciation and bad English, were teens and twenty somethings making a youthful statement to separate themselves. I'm not going to talk like those squares in upper management kinda philosophy. Or those dorky white people or posh black people from(where ever). But then the problem with a teenage whim, is these babies are having babies and these babies are learning bastardized English. And now we have two new generations of Americans or in England's case "English" speaking some GHETTO FABULOUS version of what we now used to know as English......

Now without further adieu, I leave you with a couple hilarious British skits