SPORTY DAWGS

CHICAGO TORNADO OF 2008

I should have known when I saw the water in the toilet waivering back and fourth.
It was actually swaying wildly. Then I heard the sirens and washed my hands as fast as I've ever washed them in my life. I run to an office with a t.v. but before I turn it on, I see the sky's light up non stop. Continuous lightening lighting the Chicago downtown. I was afraid to touch the t.v.
The sirens rang louder and louder. Holy crap. I turned the t.v. on and heard that Wrigley Field was evacuating the people in the stands because we had a tornado hit the near north and downtown Chicago area. Then it went dead. The cable went out. Crap! I turned on a radio. Static. Well at least I'm in a hospital. If they call a code grey, I'm in the right place. I've got a two giant water coolers and a couple turkey with mayo sandwiches and fig newtons in the fridge. I don't ever remember a tornado in my life. At least not in the metro area. We've had nasty El Nino winds, but a bonafide funnel tornado, was a first. I hung out at the office until 10 to 10. It calmed down. I ventured out hating the still flashing skys. I walked to the train station. Flashing, and more flashing up there on the platform. I'm hating every second of the 8 minute wait for the train. I'm safe. I arrive at my stop and the bus is downstairs waiting for me. No rain. 10 minutes, I see the drops on the windows slowly starting. Then they got heavier and heavier. It came down like a giant wave. Water started to come into the bus immediately. It was pretty bad. I knew my umbrella and wind breaker would be futile in keeping me dry. I got off the bus 5 minutes later in the thunder, lightening and torrents and made a run for it. BANG! CRACK! BOOM! I was terrified but finally was home. In front of my sweet residential street, I saw destroyed branches of trees and flowers shredded and littering the streets and sidewalks. Soaking wet, I walked in the building's hallway leaving a foot trail. I took the shoes off at the front door. At least I had power to come home to. 20,000 weren't so lucky.

I peeled off my skirt, socks, Mephisto's and top and just draped them over the tub and put the Mephisto's near a window cracked open a tad. Hopefully, they'll not be ruined. Now even though I will never ever have grandkids, it's a story I can tell my nieces, nephews and great nephews and nieces. My adventure out in the great Chicago tornado of "08.
My only concern now, is that we don't have any mysterious monsters wash up on our shores of Lake Michigan. Eeeeewwwwwwwwww!

MONTAUK MONSTER

Maybe this is the Chupacabra. Then again it could be the Jersey Devil. It doesn't even look like it belongs on Earth. It looks like it came from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea or the Bermuda Triangle.
I am glad I don't have a home in the Hamptons for the first time in my life. What a freaky thing!Also what's freaky is that scientists say it's not from Earth. WTF?
I can't wait until they identify it's origins. I really hope it's not Earth. Anyway, here's Jeff Corwin's take on it.

BURGLAR IN BROAD DAYLIGHT

HEADLESS HITLER

I being an art lover, don't exactly feel so bad about the head of this wax figure being ripped off in Berlin. LOL They arrested a man for doing that. Can you believe it? This should have been encased behind glass. They should have known better. Now that's a dumb ass check for the Germans.
Click on title for full story.

PREGNANT MAN GIVES BIRTH

He's an idiot and and exhibitionist. You ask why I say exhibitionist? Well he once was model and finalist in the Miss Hawaii competition. He is modeling as a pregnant man as seen in this photo. Soooooooooo that is why he is an EXHIBITIONIST.

70 YEAR OLD GRANDMA GIVES BIRTH TO TWINS

                                                                THEY'RE IDIOTS

                           She's an idiot for putting herself and her babies' health in danger.

                           He's an idiot for not seeing any value in his daughters.  

                           Frankly he's just an asshole.

CHICAGO "IT'S THE NEW AUSTRALIA"

WE FIRST STARTED TO DISCOVER THAT OUR SMALL PETS WERE BEING EATEN BY MYSTERIOUS COYOTES. THEN WE STARTED TO FIND MOUNTAIN LIONS. ONE BEING IN THE VERY MIDDLE OF OUR METROPOLITAN NEIGHBORHOOD. NOW IT'S THE MIGHTHY OL' CRUSTY ALLIGATOR. I FEEL LIKE I'M IN THE LAND OF OZ.

SEPARATED AT BIRTH?

These two chicks from different countries I swear look alike. Khandi Alexander our favorite M.E. on CSI Miami and Namrata Singh Gujral from the movie Americanizing Shelley.

WHO IS THIS FAT DUDE?

It's Tom Cruise.

DAVID COOK WINS

It's about time a bonafide rocker wins idol.
I knew he'd win because of the phone results having been published on two web sites. I just love him and his creativity. What he did with Billie Jean, Lionel Ritchie's Hello, Parton's Little Sparrow and Eleanor Rigby was sheer genius. YouTube these great performances by typing "David Cook Rigby" or "David Cook Billie Jean", and you'll see what I mean. He's dope.

LISTMANIA

MY OWN LISTMANIA

Best Male Rock Voices IMO(Listed in age order)1. Roger Daltrey from The Who fame b. 3-1-442. Freddie Mercury of Queen b. 9-5-46 d. 11-24-913. David Bowie b. 1-8-474. Dennis De Young of Styx b. 2-18-475. Elton John b. 3-25-476. Robert Plant b. 8-20-487. Paul Rodgers (Bad Company,The Firm & Queen) b. 12-17-498. Rob Halford of Judas Priest fame b. 8-25-519. Geddy Lee of Rush fame b. 7-29-5310. Kim Bendix Petersen of King Diamond b. 6-14-5611. Prince b. 6-7-5812. Bruce Dickenson of Iron Maiden b. 8-7-5813. Geoff Tate of Queensrÿche fame b. 1-14-5914. Axl Rose b. 2-6-6215. Serj Tankian of System of a Down fame b.8-21-6716. Chester Bennington of Linkin Park b. 3-20-76iIt's not that I don't think Paul and John or Mick & Ian aren't great singers, but I'm talking spine tingling vocals, which usually include great falsettos and passion when they perform.
I'll always love Ozzy, Dio, Phil et alii, but..............Am I forgetting anyone?????
Honorable mentions
Eddie Vetter
Billy Corgan &
Jim Morrison

I'M STUNNED AT THE VOTE OFF!!!!

In case none of you knew, I've been watching Ameican Idol as of this season.I am also traumatised that the American people voted Michael Johns off of Idol.
He was fantastic. He has a great voice, presence and looks. He certainly wasn't better than Kristy, Syesha, Brooke or Jason.
Who were these people voting for Kristy, Syesha and Brooke? It doesn't matter though, because he'll be the one with the big singing career while they're still are doing their lounge lizard/cruise ship performances.
I was looking forward to seeing his next performance. Here he is in great form.

I LOVE THIS GUY

His words are proudly spoken. I love him.

"Radical Islam has seen us for what we are, a soft touch. It sees that political correctness is like a drug that we just can't stop injecting, even though we know it's going to kill us. And they're taking full advantage of that. Turning our sense of fairness against us, and making us despise ourselves for one of our best qualities. And any concession made will be seen as a sign of weakness to be exploited further, because there is no dialogue with radical Islam. It doesn't want to be agreed with. It wants to be obeyed. It thinks it has the God-given right, aptly enough, to make the rules, not just for Muslims, but for everyone."

Is my favorite part.

DUSTING. NOT ONLY A HOUSEHOLD EVENT.

Another jaw dropping video. Who knew? I didn't.

HORRORS OF THE LEMON

By watching this video, your life will forever be altered....

Take the What Mixed Drink Are You Quiz at QuizRocket.com!
Make Your Own Quiz

THIS IS FOR ALL THOSE MONTHS OF TORTURE!

SEPARATED AT BIRTH?

I think these two (Jennifer Connelly and Nelly Furtado) are twins separated at birth. What do you think?

FRIDAY FLASHBACK WITH U2

Lover's From Long Ago

I love this photo. This couple died together. Probably somehow tragic like a mudslide or worse.

Odd Couple

Gorilla Lovers

FRIDAY FLASHBACK WITH THE CLASH!

The Day The Seniors Drove The Cat Nuts

Sometimes it's days like today that senior citizens annoy me royally. Today I left home 30 minutes early to go vote. The polling place was a block away from me. When I arrived every booth was taken. 22 minutes later I still was waiting. I asked, "Why the wait?" Apparently the blue haired's couldn't figure out the technology and were confused. JESUS! I wanted to stick a fork in my eye. They have all day to vote but do they have to do this between 6 and 8 AM????? I'm really a laid back person (much to the chagrin of many) and am pretty care free and patient and usually not one to rush. But this was ridiculous already. I walked out. I went back after work. They also make doctors appointments at the end of the day, so that a working person can't get a late appointment. How do I know this? Because I'm sometimes the lady giving them appointments at the doctors office. They're always asking me for 4 PM or later appointments. Why? You don't work. For what reason on God's green Earth do you need such a late appointment? I never ask but sometimes when I refuse to give them the late ones, they say, dumb things like I have majong or bridge or exercise class. O FRIKKEN WELL! I GUESS YOU'LL HAVE TO MISS A DAY SUNSHINE. Crimeny. Give me a break.
Now don't you all jump to conclusions, I'm not heartless. If someone said, "But
meals on wheels comes between 4 and 5:30 with my dinner", I'll bend over backwards. But stupid replies like Bingo starts at 2:30 just don't fly with me.
Why do senior citizens do selfish things like this? Because they can.

TO THE RITZ JAMES

Last night I was at a charity benefit at the Ritz downtown Chicago. It was a nice gala with decent food, and music.
Of course there was the silent auctions for a number of things. But mostly it was raising money for the homeless. I never noticed how many there were living on the streets and not in shelters. Especially here in Chicago where the weather has been in the minus single digits or freezing with several inches of snowfall blanketing the city. I notice these poor unfortunates as I'd take the L home between 9 and 10, after dining with "the boyfriend", who lives behind the John Hancock building.
Well it started at 5:30 and I had to work. So I brought the shoes, hosiery and jewelry to work Thursday and the dress and pashmina on Friday. When I woke up Friday morning it had snowed at least 8 inches. It was a mess. I'd have to drag my UGLY totebag with me to the gala. To put a sweater and jeans in, to change into after the benefit for the L ride home. Anyway, Friday I get the goodies out of my locker and take them to the employee bathroom. Wash my face, and put on fresh makeup. Put on the dress, hose, giant wool socks, my old ankle high Frye boots, long wool coat and pashmina over my coat, so it doesn't wrinkle. God I looked like a dork. I put the gorgeous heels in a plastic garbage can liner with a lint brush and the sweater and jeans and stuff them all in a tote bag. Before the short cab ride to the Ritz, as I usually do, I look at the drivers id and address him by his first name, e.g.

"Tyrone I'm going to La Trattoria in Old Town", or "Mahmood to the AMC at 2600 N. Western". But today his name was James. Without thinking, I said, "James, I'm going to the Ritz". It then hit me. Just like the posh heiress in the movies, who says, "James, to the Ritz" I giggled. "To the Ritz James. The Ritz Carlton!" We get there, I pay him and run in to find a corner to be unseen while de cloaking. It was easy, no one in site. I take off the boots and socks and put them in the plastic bag. Put on the heels and start to freshen up by taking the lint off my hose and fluff up my dress. Voilà I'm done. Get to the cloak room, ditch the coat and tote. Duck into the ladies room to fix the static hair. Voilà again. I arrived without a second to spare. Dinner was served 15 minutes later. I was frazzled getting there for nothing. I was paranoid I'd slip and fall or I'd get sloshed while hailing a cab. I looked perfect and I never ever say that (being the critic I am).
But strangers told me so. (Lots of dress compliments) It's been a while since I had to dress up for an event with messy weather outside. I pulled it off so I'm da bomb. The end result was fab. The lady I sat next to was an organiser of the benefit and the numbers surpassed last years event. We were all happy for that.

FLASHBACK WITH YAZOO (OR YAZ)

FRIDAY FLASHBACK W/The Dominatrix Sleeps Tonight

REAGALE BEAGLE

O.K. so many of you have emailed me asking where did I go on my birthday. Well for starters, many places. I started last weekend and I still haven't finished celebrating. I go with different people now and then to celebrate.
The first place was a bowling alley for a couple games with four girlfriends, then Italian to follow. I had a date a few days prior to that to Cafe Iberico, downtown Chicago for some Spanish tapas. After that I wanted to go to the Regale Beagle after I saw an ad for the place and so Sunday after noon it was straight to the Beagle.
It was o.k. it was a bar with many t.v.'s. We watched New England and San Diego kick off. Then had finger food (mini burgers for me) and then chocolate fondu for dessert. SUGAR SHOCK!!! I haven't fondued for a decade. Wow is all I can say. Heaven is chocolate banana! The actual dessert is a chocolate fondu with a plate full of pound cake, strawberries, banana slices, pineapple slices and marshmallows.
The theme of the place is 70's and 80's memorabilia. Mostly photos of the stars of the hit shows of the 70's and 80's.

You Know You're Getting Old When..........

Your 50 something friend gives you her copy of The Wisdom of Menopause.
Girl Scouts call you maam.
You die your hair and the grey is still showing even after you've had the crap on for an hour!
When teenagers think people your age don't have sex anymore.
When people you meet, born in your birth year look frightfully old.
When you realize that all the oldies you hear on the radio are only about 22 years old.
When you find mysterious hairs in places that never had these mysterious hairs before.
When you discover that wearing one contact lens actually works better for you.

And when you're talking about having lunch and drinks at the * Reagle Beagle (again) some get the joke and some need some 'splainin'.

~

I just turned 49 Monday.
I thought that would be a cool thing.
But it actually SUCKS.

* See next post

FRIDAY FLASHBACK W/HAIRCUT 100

Remember them?

Watch the piano playing cat.

Watch this cat eat corn on the cob.

BIPOLAR IS THE NEW STUPID.

Britney bipolar??? Is that what they're calling "stupid" these days? The new politically correct version for "stupid", "heedless", "unaware", "clueless", "blockhead" is now classified as "Bipolar".
BIPOLAR IS THE NEW STUPID. But in her case, those who really are Bipolar, I feel sorry for you all, to have such a drip in the same category as you. May you folk, find peace in the coming months.
It's not entirely her fault though. I mean let's look at her wonderful role model parents. "DUR"

TTFN and have a nice week y'all!
Me-OW

Robert Rodriguez of Chingon

This guy takes my breath away when he sings Malaguena Salerosa but doesn't take his away at all.
Listen it's great. (And yes, if it brings the movie Kill Bill to mind, you're right. Chingon was a featured artist from the movie)

HOW TO VACUUM YOUR CAT